Thursday, 20 March 2014
Maybe risking it is a good idea...
The greater the risk, the greater the outcome.
As mundane as the beginning of a story can get, recently I was on the phone with my mum. I was venting my everlasting frustrations at her about the school system, and how underwhelmed I've been feeling about university life.
Recently, and maybe this is my annoyance just resurfacing, I've felt a lot of the assignments I've been getting are just ...stupid. For lack of a better word they're just dumb as hell, and I feel like I'm doing them all for nothing.
Literally using my time, energy, paper and ink on an assignment for NOTHING but a mark. Also the assignments have just been so vague, I'm wondering if my professors are becoming lazy to write properly thought out assignments. In spite of all this, my Film professor gave us an essay to do, which was actually a proper assignment with clear instructions. I wrote it and sent to my mom for a once over.
I'm actually quite proud of it, and I haven't been superbly proud with any assignment I've done thus far in my university career. Let's just say I entitled it "Elephants & Psychos."
Quite pleased with that title, thus quite pleased with my work.
A part of the assignment was comparing a film called Elephant by Gus Van Sant to his version of the popular thriller Psycho. My mom suggested I added to the essay that the title Elephant has something to do with the saying "The elephant in the room". I'd thought about it, as it made sense, but chose not to include it for fear of it being wrong. I told her this.
"The thing about having all these vague assignments, Leah, is that there is really no wrong answer. You've got to let go of that fear of being wrong. The greater the risk, the greater the outcome."
Though she was only talking about an assignment what she said got my brain firing at a million miles per hour. The greater the risk, the greater the outcome. There are so many, and I do mean SO MANY things I've held myself back from saying or doing out of fear. A crippling fear. A fear that literally holds me back from saying things, as if I can't speak. Stops me from doing things as if I physically can't. Because the fear does tell me I can't, or at least I shouldn't because the outcome will not be worth that risk.
I guess the saying in and of it self is a metaphor for life. Life has no instructions. It is, for all intents and purposes, a vague poorly thought out assignment for us to do. That's simultaneously the difficulty and beauty in it. But just as including a saying in my essay that I'm not sure of could be the difference between an A and a B, taking risks in life and sometimes letting life just be is what will make it worth our while.
I know there a lot of people out there thinking the same things. People who are just too scared to walk the path less travelled by.
Walk it. Walk it bravely.
Hell, walk it without shoes, you fearless son of a gun.
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